मोरपंख - Peacock Feathers.

Would you believe that I was a shy kid? Looking at me now and through the years - winged liner, coloured hair, cheerful demeanour, voice dripping with affected sass; would you believe that I was a quiet child?
Yeah, me neither. But I've always been reserved. I was never the kid to volunteer to go on stage and dance, I was never the kid who spoke out of turn, I was never the kid who interjected. I believe in quiet grace, I believe in dignity. I believe that when the world paints a target on your back, the only way to defend yourself is to be as still as possible. Moving targets are always the most lucrative.
Growing up as an enthusiastic, flamboyant little boy in small towns all over the country, I have learned the value of silence. I learned the value of solitude. I learned, mostly the hard way. For all my extroversions, I'm still the impressionable boy in the fifth row to the left with his head down, hoping that the jeering will stop if he refuses to acknowledge it. If he refuses to respond to it. For years I've built an armour around myself, putting it together piece by piece and brick by brick. I've become stage direction and misinterpretation, humour and hubris, sleight of hand and smoke and mirrors because that is what keeps me safe.
Peacocks have massive tails that are a hinderance and by all standards of evolution, completely useless. These tails make them easy prey, make them slow and are unwieldy. But when mating season arrives, the peacock proudly displays his tail as a sign to a potential mate;
"Look at me. Look at the burden I have carried all these years. A burden that, statistically, should have killed me. But it didn't. I survived it and hence I'm the most viable candidate. Pick me because my burden is beautiful and it is deadly. Pick me because it has made me stronger."
And on days that I feel low, I look at peacocks dancing on my rooftop to remind myself that not all burdens are ugly. Not all baggage is dead weight. Sometimes when the world gets me down, all I have to do is spread my own version of peacock feathers and dance in a haze of opulence and impracticality.
"Look at me. What hasn't killed me has only made me more fabulous"

-Arun Shah